At first I was very tentative in moving out of Covid hibernation.
Then I was giddy when out for the first time at a restaurant.
Next came the long overdue connection with my family. Finally, I had the opportunity to meet my new granddaughter whose birth I was unable to attend.
I am beginning to grasp that I am a changed woman. Living alone during a pandemic with a high-risk, underlying medical condition was unbelievably difficult. Were it not for my horse, the dear friends who boarded her, and my garden, I just don’t know how I would have managed.
I am finding that community moments are to savor. Never in a million years could I imagine saying this for I am an introvert and find public endeavors exhausting. Now I find pleasure in small talk…something I use to avoid at all costs. I will NEVER take for granted the essential need for touch and connection.
I am working to lose all the weight I gained during the pandemic and making some progress with a quirky program called Noom. Sweet tooth is gone and food tastes better. I have learned that I have been dreadfully dehydrated while living in my small desert town. Now, with that corrected, I am experiencing much less mental confusion that significantly complicated a rough PTSD episode a few months back.
Some of the changes I am noticing are small. Never fond of shopping, one amazing discovery was the “drive by” grocery pickup. This will be a new part of my life going forward!
Some of the changes are bigger. I am feeling more confident in my personal resilience. While I am increasingly experiencing the physical shortcomings of aging, my hope for future adventures is back and stronger than ever! Setting goals, achieving them….definitely back on track.
What hasn’t changed is my commitment to living in kairos – noticing and joining with each moment and fully savoring it. Not unlike mindfulness, it creates a spiritual practice for me that offers peace and awe.
“Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world.” John Milton